Much Apu About Nothing
Season 7 / Episode 23

D-ohh!

( screams)

Run, Daddy, run!

Open the door, Maude!

I don't have time for the secret knock!

Maude: Oh, I'm panicking, Neddy.

I can't work the knob!

Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!

This is Kent Brockman

with a special report from the Channel 6 news copter.

A large bear-like animal, most likely a bear

has wandered down from the hills in search of food

or perhaps employment.

Please, remain calm.

Stay in your homes.

Looks like bad news for the...

Impson family.

Let's all calm down.

Everyone's going to be just fine

as long as I've got enough beers.

( screams)

All right, that does it.

If I'm going to be trapped inside the house

I got to go out and buy some beer.

Now to drop gracefully through the windshield.

Ahh!

I got you, Dad!

Ahh!

Sweet dreams, Smokey.

Oww!

Animal tranquilizer!

Ohh...

Smooth.

( belches)

Book 'em, Lou.

One count of being a bear.

And one count

of being an accessory to being a bear.

Oh, Marge, it was horrible.

We were trapped in the house all afternoon

and... well...

we had to drink toilet water.

Well, things were bad everywhere.

I'm sick of these constant bear attacks!

It's like a freakin' country bear jamboroo around here.

Well, now, realistically, Homer

I've lived here some 30-odd years.

This is the first and only bear I've ever seen.

Hey

if you want wild bears eating your children

and scaring away your salmon

that's your business.

But I'm not going to take it!

Who's with me?

I am! I am! I am!

Homer: We're here! We're queer! We don't want any more bears!

Crowd: We're here! We're queer! We don't want any more bears!

Hey Homer, that's a pretty catchy chant.

Where'd you learn it?

Oh, I heard it

at the mustache parade they have every year.

Sir, there's an unruly mob to see you.

Does it have an appointment?

Uh... yes it does.

I phoned ahead.

Mr. Mayor, I hate to break it to you

but your city is infested with bears.

And these ones are smarter than the average bear.

They swiped my pic-a-nic basket.

Think of the children.

Very well.

I promise swift and decisive action

against these hibernating hucksters.

( cheering)

( chuckling)

Ahh, not a bear in sight.

The bear patrol must be working like a charm.

That's specious reasoning, Dad.

Thank you, honey.

By your logic, I could claim