Marge on the Lam
Season 5 / Episode 6

[ Chorus ] ♪ THE SIMPSONS ♪

[ Tires Screeching ]

D'OH! [ Screams ]

WELL, SIR, IT HAS BEEN AN UNEVENTFUL WEEK IN BADGER FALLS,

WHERE THE WOMEN ARE ROBUST, THE MEN ARE PINK-CHEEKED,

AND THE CHILDREN ARE PINK-CHEEKED AND ROBUST.

[ Laughing ]

WHAT THE HELL'S SO FUNNY?

[ Inhales ] AT THE APPLE BISCUIT CAFE,

WHERE THE SMILES ARE FREE, DON'T YOU KNOW,

SVEN INQVIST STUDIED THE MENU.

FINALLY, HE ORDERED THE SAME THING HE HAS EVERY DAY.

[ Laughter ]

- MAYBE IT'S THE TV. - STUPID TV. BE MORE FUNNY! [ Grunts ]

WELL, SIR, I THINK IT IS TIME TO TURN THIS PLEDGE DRIVE...

OVER TO TROY McCLURE.

I CAN'T KEEP UP THIS PACE FOREVER.

[ Deep Sigh ]

HI, I'M TROY McCLURE. YOU MIGHT REMEMBER ME FROM SUCH TELETHONS AS...

"OUT WITH GOUT '88" AND "LET'S SAVE TONY ORLANDO'S HOUSE."

FOLKS, DO YOU REALIZE WITHOUT YOUR SUPPORT,

PUBLIC TELEVISION CAN'T AFFORD TO BRING YOU SUCH AWARD-WINNING SHOWS AS...

EDWARD THE PENITENT?

I'M REALLY, REALLY, REALLY SORRY.

I'M AFRAID SORRY DOESN'T CUT IT WITH THIS POPE.

- OH-HO. - [ Phone Ringing ]

WHAT THE HELL? OH, WE GOT A CALL.

[ Chuckles ] SOME IDIOT ACTUALLY CALLED IN.

HELLO. WHAT'S YOUR NAME? MARGE SIMPSON.

[ Screams ] I'D LIKE TO PLEDGE $30. OH, THANK YOU.

MARGE, IT'S PUBLIC TV. THEY NEVER HAVE ANYTHING GOOD.

WHERE ARE THE GERALDOS? WHERE ARE THE EUBANKSES-SES?

THEY NEED OUR SUPPORT. BESIDES, THEY GAVE ME TWO TICKETS TO THE BALLET.

- THE BALLET? WHOO-HOO! - YOU LIKE BALLET?

MARJORIE, PLEASE. I ENJOY ALL THE MEATS OF OUR CULTURAL STEW.

AHH, BALLET.

HEE-HEE-HEE. ALL RIGHT. WHOO-HOO! YEA!

[ Laughing ] YEAH!

♪ [ Humming With Calliope Music ]

♪ [ Continues ]

[ Doorbell Rings ] ♪ [ Humming Continues ]

HELLO, RUTH. HI, MARGE.

I WAS WONDERING IF YOU HAD A POWER SANDER I COULD BORROW.

- HOMER? - NOPE.

- [ Whirring ] - THAT'S ONE RIGHT THERE.

ALL RIGHT. BUT, REMEMBER, IT'S MINE.

THAT'S WHAT BALLET IS? [ Groans ]

YOU PROMISED. YOU CAN'T BACK OUT LIKE WHEN YOU VOLUNTEERED...

FOR THAT ARMY EXPERIMENT TO AVOID DINNER AT MY SISTERS'.

MR. SIMPSON, YOU DO REALIZE THIS MAY RESULT IN...

HAIR LOSS, GIDDINESS AND THE LOSS OF EQUILIBRIUM?

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. JUST GIVE ME THE SERUM.

[ Chuckles ] IT WAS WORTH IT.

[ Body Thuds On Floor ] [ Homer Giggling ]

HEY, HOMER, YOU WANNA GET A BEER ON THE WAY HOME? I CAN'T.

I GOTTA TAKE MY WIFE TO THE BALLET.