Treehouse of Horror IV
Season 5 / Episode 5

[ Ghostly Shriek ]

[ Evil Laughter ]

[ Gunfire ]

[ All Moaning ]

PAINTINGS:

LIFELESS IMAGES RENDERED IN COLORFUL GOOP.

BUT AT NIGHT, THEY TAKE ON A LIFE OF THEIR OWN.

THEY BECOME PORTALS TO HELL...

SO SCARY AND HORRIBLE AND GRUESOME THAT--

BART, YOU SHOULD WARN PEOPLE THIS EPISODE IS VERY FRIGHTENING.

MAYBE THEY'D RATHER LISTEN TO THAT OLD WAR OF THE WORLDS BROADCAST ON N.P.R., HMM?

YES, MOTHER. GOOD.

NOW, YOU HOLD MAGGIE. I'M GOING TO BUY SOME EARRINGS AT THE GIFT SHOP.

[ Sighs ] THE SUBJECT OF OUR FIRST PAINTING TONIGHT IS THE MOST...

FOUL, EVIL, VICIOUS, DIABOLICAL BEAST TO STALK THE EARTH.

OF COURSE, I REFER TO--

[ Muffled ]

THE DEVIL.

AND NEXT IN OUR FALL CATALOG-- WE LOVE THIS--

IT IS A VISION IN RASPBERRY CREAM.

[ Applause ]

OHH! PURE GENIUS.

[ Gurgling ]

OH! AND NOW TO MAKE THE LEAP FROM DREAMS TO REALITY.

SORRY, HOMER. WHILE YOU WERE DAYDREAMING, WE ATE ALL THE DOUGHNUTS.

WELL, THERE WERE A FEW LEFT, BUT WE CHUCKED 'EM AT AN OLD MAN FOR KICKS.

DAMN BUZZARDS! I AIN'T DEAD YET!

ALL RIGHT. STAY CALM. REMEMBER YOUR TRAINING.

"DEAR HOMER, I.O.U. ONE EMERGENCY DOUGHNUT. SIGNED, HOMER."

BASTARD! HE'S ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD.

OH! I'D SELL MY SOUL FOR A DOUGHNUT!

[ Rumbling ] WELL, THAT CAN BE ARRANGED.

FLANDERS! YOU'RE THE DEVIL?

IT'S ALWAYS THE ONE YOU LEAST SUSPECT.

NOW, MANY PEOPLE OFFER TO SELL THEIR SOULS...

WITHOUT REFLECTING UPON THE GRAVE RAMIFICA--

- DO YOU HAVE A DOUGHNUT OR NOT? - COMING UP.

JUST SIGN HERE. CAREFUL, HOT PEN.

HMM. WHO'S THAT GOAT-LEGGED FELLOW? I LIKE THE CUT OF HIS JIB.

UH, PRINCE OF DARKNESS, SIR. HE'S YOUR 11:00.

[ Gasps ] AH!

NOW, REMEMBER, THE INSTANT YOU FINISH IT, I OWN YOUR SOUL FOR--

HEY, WAIT, IF I DON'T FINISH THIS LAST BITE,

YOU DON'T GET MY SOUL, DO YOU?

UH, TECHNICALLY NO, BUT--- I'M SMARTER THAN THE DEVIL! I'M SMARTER THAN THE DEV--

YOU ARE NOT SMARTER THAN ME!

I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL YET, HOMER SIMPSON!

NOT LIKELY. [ Chuckles ]

[ Muttering ]

HM. HM. HM.

MMM!

MMM! FORBIDDEN DOUGHNUT.

HMM? WELL, WELL. FINISHING SOMETHING?

[ Screams ]

[ Whimpering ]

[ Gasps ]

HOMER, DID YOU EAT THAT DOUGHNUT? NO.

YOUR WIDE BEHIND WON'T SAVE YOU THIS TIME. HEY, BART.

HEY. WAIT!

DOESN'T MY FATHER HAVE THE RIGHT TO A FAIR TRIAL?

OH, YOU AMERICANS WITH YOUR "DUE PROCESS" AND "FAIR TRIALS."

THIS IS ALWAYS SO MUCH EASIER IN MEXICO. ALL RIGHT. VERY WELL.

WE'LL HAVE THE TRIAL TOMORROW AT THE STROKE OF MIDNIGHT.

TILL THEN, YOU'RE GOING TO SPEND THE DAY IN HELL!

[ Screaming ]

[ Sighs ] THAT WASN'T SO BAD.

HUH? OW! OW! OW!

SO, YOU LIKE DOUGHNUTS, EH?

UH-HUH. WELL,

HAVE ALL THE DOUGHNUTS IN THE WORLD!

[ Cackling ]

MORE. MMM!

I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT. JAMES COCO WENT MAD IN 15 MINUTES.

[ Chiming ]

HOMER, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? NO.

MR. SIMPSON, DON'T YOU WORRY. I WATCHED MATLOCK IN A BAR LAST NIGHT.

THE SOUND WASN'T ON, BUT I THINK I GOT THE GIST OF IT.

HEAR YE! HEAR YE!

THE COURT OF INFERNAL AFFAIRS IS NOW IN SESSION.

VERY WELL. BUT FIRST, SOME GROUND RULES.

NUMBER ONE: WE GET BATHROOM BREAKS EVERY HALF HOUR.

AGREED. NUMBER TWO: THE JURY WILL BE CHOSEN BY ME.

AGREED. NO, WAIT!

SILENCE! I GIVE YOU THE JURY OF THE DAMNED!

BENEDICT ARNOLD. LIZZIE BORDEN. RICHARD NIXON.

BUT I'M NOT DEAD YET. IN FACT, I JUST WROTE AN ARTICLE FOR REDBOOK.

- HEY, LISTEN, I DID A FAVOR FOR YOU. - YES, MASTER.

JOHN WILKES BOOTH. BLACKBEARD THE PIRATE. JOHN DILLINGER.

AND THE STARTING LINE OF THE 1976 PHILADELPHIA FLYERS.

- [ Gasps ] - [ Chattering ]

I'M SORRY, MR. BLACKBEARD. WE'RE LOW ON CHAIRS, AND THIS IS THE LAST ONE.

ARR! THIS CHAIR BE HIGH, SAYS I.

[ Clears Throat ] I HOLD HERE A CONTRACT BETWEEN MYSELF AND ONE HOMER SIMPSON,

PLEDGING ME HIS SOUL FOR A DOUGHNUT!

WHICH I DELIVERED! AND IT WAS SCRUM-DIDILLY-UMPTIOUS.

I SIMPLY ASK FOR WHAT IS MINE.

- [ Murmuring ] - THAT WAS A RIGHT PRETTY SPEECH, SIR.

BUT I ASK YOU, WHAT IS A CONTRACT?

WEBSTER'S DEFINES IT AS "AN AGREEMENT UNDER THE LAW WHICH IS UNBREAKABLE."

"WHICH IS UNBREAKABLE"!

EXCUSE ME. I MUST USE THE RESTROOM.

[ Door Slams ]

UH, MR. HUTZ?

HOMER SIMPSON, I HAVE NO CHOICE...

BUT TO SENTENCE YOU TO AN ETERNITY OF--

WAIT! BEFORE YOU SEND HIM TO HELL, THERE'S SOMETHING YOU SHOULD SEE.

THAT'S A PHOTO OF HOMER AND ME AT OUR WEDDING.

WAIT A MINUTE. YOU GOT MARRIED IN AN EMERGENCY ROOM?

WELL, HOMER ATE THE ENTIRE WEDDING CAKE BY HIMSELF...

BEFORE THE WEDDING.

READ THE BACK! THE BACK!

ARR. 'TIS SOME KIND OF TREASURE MAP.

- YOU IDIOT, YOU CAN'T READ. - AYE, 'TIS TRUE.

MY DEBAUCHERY WAS MY WAY OF COMPENSATIN'.

"DEAR MARGE, YOU HAVE GIVEN ME YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE.

"ALL I CAN GIVE YOU IN RETURN IS MY SOUL,

WHICH I PLEDGE TO YOU FOREVER."

[ Murmuring ]

WE'VE HEARD ENOUGH. YOUR HONOR,